WHERE IT ALL STARTED:?
For 17 years I was abused at home by my father. ?As the years went on I became more sad, angry, hurt and closed off. ?I was so alone. ?My family weren?t there for me as I would have liked to. ?My life was hell, but now I love my life and I?m glad I have been through what I have been through.
OVERCOMING MY TROUBLED CHILDHOOD:
I found many ways to escape the hell of a life I was living. ?From reading, writing, listening to music, watching movies and going online. ?I found comfort in meeting people online. ?Being honest about my life to those people was a great comfort and a great weight off my shoulders.
No one understood why I spoke to strangers online, but it was a huge comfort for me. ?I even met my boyfriend online and we are now in a long distance relationship. ?I really couldn?t be happier.
For a long time I didn?t talk to anyone about how I felt. ?I talked about what I had been through to strangers, but never spoke to people close to me about how I felt. ?Being vulnerable was a big no-no for me. ?I hate showing off my feelings and looking weak.
MY LIFE CHANGING MOMENT:
Last year I began learning that I needed to talk. ?I needed to stop hurting the people I cared about. ?When I didn?t talk about how I felt, I would explode over the smallest things and lash out by saying or doing things that would upset the people I cared for.
THEN REALITY HIT ME:
**** I KNEW I NEEDED HELP ****
- I begun counseling and started to open up.? This helped a lot with the way that I am now.? The?only person I truly talk to is my boyfriend Ryan and he helps me get through my hardest, down?days.? No matter how I?m feeling he always gets me to laugh and smile.
- To get over childhood trauma it takes a lot of time and patience.
- I don?t believe I will ever be 100% recovered from everything that I have been through, but I?know that I can work through it with Ryan and work on making my life better and not let my past?affect my future.